Spare your family and friends the unnecessary financial difficulties that occur at time of death.
Eliminate the anxiety, grief and expenses as much as possible.
Those you care about will be glad you did.
PLAN NOW!
Ensure funds are available to provide for your wishes.
Make the decision now so your family doesn't need to worry.
Provide extra cash for unexpected expenses.
Then in small print at the bottom of the flyer that the preceding message arrived on.
"This card is sent to inform all families -we sincerely hope it reaches no family with illness or bereavement at this time"
You're damn right they don't want to talk to anyone who's already dead or almost there, since the flyer was from an insurance company. Too late to get any money from you anymore.
But that's not my point, it's just the part that made me smile.
My point is, what's with all this guilt tripping about dying? I figure you're doing your family a favour by writing off an ongoing liability. If your family is so god-awful worried about the stress and expense of having to bury you, shouldn't they be the ones that are putting a contingency in place....putting a little aside each month. I can tell you right now my dear friends and family, that when the time comes and you can't afford to shove me in a furnace or cram me in a wooden box then tough shit for you. Do whatever the hell you like because I ain't gonna worry about it.
Which makes me wonder? What are the rules? I know you're not allowed just to dig a hole for your loved ones in the back yard but what if you just refuse to do anything. What if you just choose to leave grampa laying out on the front walk? Can they force you to give money to some third party to dispense with him in a more socially acceptable manner? Again, I say to you, if you want to find out what happens please feel free to experiment with me. Drag me out to the curb and put a garbage tag on me. I know for sure that they won't take me away without one of those, at least not in my community. Of course I'm sure you would want to harvest my brain first so that medical science can study it in an effort to understand just what the hell happened.
And while we're on the topic, I have decided to live just a few years shy of the average life span for a canadian male. I think that would have me kicking the bucket at about 75. And it just occurs to me that if I really wanted to do my family a favour, then at or about that time I would simply disappear. After all I'm pretty sure they ain't gonna spend any money looking for me and there can't be any funeral costs if there ain't no body! I rest my case. I think I'll tell the insurance company to go blow! Of course if I just disappear you'll be without my brain and I'm still pretty sure there are some amazing anomalies in there that would warrant more than a few paragraphs in some medical journal while simultaneously providing for a new entry in Ripley's Believe it or Not!
I think we should all be put on some kind of a timeline anyway. I know just thinking that I'm gonna live for another 21 years and then move on is a very soothing feeling. It's so much easier to plan. The greatest fear in my life is that I will end up dying without having spent all the money I worked so hard to get. Wouldn't that be a waste? After all, we all know it's so much more fun to spend money than to earn it, so wouldn't it be a shame to earn more than you had the time to spend?
And that's it for me. I promise another guest blog tomorrow.
A few final comments
1)John I'm glad you like the pic....I snuck it into Mary's post!
2)Anyone, who the hell is gagandeep?
3) gagandeep, you've obviously pissed Cory off somehow, so watch your back
“They say such nice things about people at their funerals that it makes me sad to realize I'm going to miss mine by just a few days"---Garrison Keillor
....and this one I send out especially to my socially conscious son Michael who I know will appreciate it...
“When a nation's young men are conservative, its funeral bell is already rung"---Henry Ward Beecher
"Them good old boys were drinking whiskey and rye, singing this'll be the the day that I die"---Don Maclean
love
peter
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6 comments:
I am pretty sure they can make you pay for proper diposal of your relatives body. I like your idea of disappearing. The only catch is the people who love you would be concerned, so just give us a bit of warning and it's all good.
Love Old John
i want the kids to burn me up and dig me into the garden...
Pete, I think because of your size and weight, they might expect two garbage tags to ensure that they take you away.
As for me, I too like Elly, would like to be burned but I would like my ashes sprinkled over a marijuana field so ya'll can smoke me.
Gagandeep is my geriatrician, who was messing with my computer at work and I somehow managed to post under his name - for some reason he didn't need to use a password like I do. I didn't realize it till it was too late and I am not technically savvy enough to know how it happened. I do realize that I should have just deleted it and started over but I'm not sure I could have done that either.
I also prefer to be reduced to ashes (unless sciebce might have a use for the intact parts) but I don't care where I'm dispersed. However I do not wish to live on anyone's mantle, or on a shelf in the garage. Unless its with the power tools. And I hope I live long enough to smoke a little Roo.
I believe you can have your own burial plot on your property, so long as it is at least 100 feet from any drinking water source....I am going to be burned up too. No grave robbers coming to dig me up for my false teeth.
the only way I want to smoke a little Roo is if she is there, which isn't likely...
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