Well, here I sit, and ramble.
Last week I heard my oldest brothers voice for the first time since the Christmas in July (or was it August) of 2008. It stunned me when I came to this realization because it seems like it was only a few weeks ago we were all in the back yard playing volleyball wearing silly umbrella hats and hoping Andy would recover from “THE INCIDENT”. It also came to me then that this is the last time I had seen or spoken to most of my siblings. For those of you Non-members of the clan, my name is Dave. This may confuse my siblings as for forty one years (yes the baby is 41 and that should make you all feel very old) they have known me to be David, but for the last twenty five or so it has been Dave. I have also been referred to, by my siblings and others I am sure, as “The Baby”, “The Runt”, “The youngest of twelve” or simply as “That spoiled little shit”. I love all of my siblings but I sometimes wonder why.
Like Terry I have not taken the opportunity to read this blog in a very long time but when Pete called me I did try to go back several months as he assured me my sibs had some very interesting things to say. Well, he was right. I quite enjoyed reading several of the posts. Pete also tried to convince me that my sibs would like to hear what I have to say and although I am certain Pete believes this to be true and may actually want to hear it himself I doubt he is basing this belief on any type of research or fact.
As for the people I call my siblings, I know all of your names, most of your spouses and children, but to actually say I know you would be a gross exaggeration. I have been told that for a brief period of time we actually all lived under the same roof. I have vague memories of Terry just before he moved out, and again for you “Non-members” Terry is number seven. What happened to the first six, I have no clue. Larry was gone to University shortly after, I remember Sudbury being a long way away at the time although in all the years he was up there I was never allowed to make the trip. Now I go there every couple months for work and appreciate the beauty of the landscape every visit. NOT.
Next was John, “Big Brother” by definition if there ever was one. In my childhood I remember him to be smart as a whip, strong as an ox, mean as a bull and as caring as a rock. As I aged and grew John also grew, although he may not have known it, into the best friend of my early adulthood and the best councillor and confidant a fellow could ask for. Thanks Bro. By the way, the day of your manure war with Larry, I was the reason Dad met you outside the door. Sorry for ratting you out but you were always Dad’s favourite so any chance to knock you down was a chance I was taking. You should have seen the look on their faces when I ran to the house and told them what you guys were doing. It was priceless.
After John, well my dears sisters Stella and Betty. The only sisters I really knew as a child. Like many closely aged siblings we shared a childhood of mutual annoyance and terrorization which thankfully grew into a friendship I still appreciate today. Stella, I cannot remember a time that we were together and I did not laugh. I miss you, come visit. Betty, you say not many people know, and I may be wrong (I am finding that happens a lot) but I feel I do know you for I am just a younger version with a harder shell and maybe a better disguise. Neither of these things are good or helpful in any way but I will try to keep smiling if you do.
For the rest of you, my sib’s, you have all had impacts on my life and I am glad to say I remember more good than bad. The parents you describe in your letters, or posts if you will, I am afraid to say I did not know. The parents I knew were loving and caring and worried but most of all they were old and tired. Some of you describe moments of fun with Dad, my earliest memory is of him with a cane because his back was so sore he could hardly walk. Not much is said about our mother in this blog and I am not sure why. She loved every one of us and worried about the eleven of you “Older Children” every day I knew her. Unfortunatly, with Wheel Of Fortune mixed in and being asleep by 8:30 at night that didn’t leave much time for “The Baby”. In Mom’s eyes I could do no wrong, had no problems, and in short was the perfect child. I sometimes think if I had stood in front of her and lit the house on fire she would have blamed someone else. I don’t mean to say bad things about our parents because I know they did the best they could, but twelve is a lot. I know this because I have two and two is a lot. I regularly pray for the guidance of my Father and even more regularly I look to heaven and apologize to my Mother for as some of you may know I was not actually “A Perfect Child”.
I know I have rambled on but if I may I would like to say a few words about the most important part of my family. Any one who still thinks blood is thicker than water has not met my wife and the two wonderful children she has shared with me. We have no blood connection but I live every day for them and would die any day for them. They are my life.
I strive not to be the best at anything but to be the best I can be, and hopefully, better tomorrow.
There were many things I wanted to say here today, I have expressed some and forgotten to include some I am certain.
I live everyday being sorry for the pain I have caused, happy for the love I have been given and hopeful for the days to come.
The best advise I have every been given, “Find someone to Love”. Thanks John.
The most important lesson I have ever learned, “You can’t Un-Hurt someone”.
Favorite song lyric, as it seems to be a theme.
“A word’s just a word til you mean what you say, and Love isn’t love til you give it away”. – Jonas Brothers or Miley Cyrus or some other Disney crap that my wonderful daughter listens to.
Mercifully, that’s all I’ve got,
Love, DAVE
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Good point about Mom David. I'll see what I can do about that.
Much to our surprise we found out tonite that there's another Roo out there. It took us a few minutes to find you Jessica! I think you need to start calling your self "young Roo"....but thanks for the comment, and keep on keepin on!
"Who is it?
It's me Dave man, open the door"
Who?
It's Dave, c'mon man open the damn door!!!
Dave's not here"---"Cheech Marin/Tommy Chong
"Don't you want somebody to love
Don't you need somebody to love
Wouldn't you love somebody to love
You better find somebody to love"---Darby Slick
love
peter
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4 comments:
I miss you too David.
Great post.
I often think about you and wish our lives hadn't moved us so far apart physically. I think one of the reasons mom hasn't made the blog so much is mom herself. She was naturally more quiet and reserved and would gladly put herself out of the spotlight to help it shine on those she loved.
Love Old John
I know it's not a very long story but I didn't know grandma very well. I loved visiting her at aunt Cory's. Even though she didn't remember who I was all the time she always made me feel comfortable and loved while I was there. She also always had this stash of cookies. My fav. were the "cigar" cookies. haha From the litte time I was able to know her for I deffinitly thing she was an amazing grandmother! <3
David...It was a delight to hear from you. I remember a time when you helped me put 'roll roofing' on a house on Queen street. I enjoyed learning from you along with some other foibles that came with it. We all have them, we just do not see our own annoying idiosyncracies the same as we see others.
David, when you reference pain you may have caused someone, know that you are not alone. We are all sinners, and 'my god' doesn't put sins on a spectrum.
If you are one of those people that think that my kid, brother, father etc. would never do that, I personally think you can be in for a big surprise. For me, it is learning from your mistakes, and believing that everyone deserves a second chance.
I am so happy that you have found someone to love and that it is reciprocated. I believe it was Elly who said, "in the end it is all about love" or something like that.
Love you unconditionally, warts and all.
Love Old Roo
I miss you too Dave and wrote a fairly long story about some of the time I was lucky enough to share with Mom, maybe i'll show it to you one day
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