"Thats It!"

Three weeks tomorrow is the big day, and my taper officially starts now! I can’t believe it’s here but I'll tell you it’s just in time. I have felt sluggish ever since my strong run on Wednesday and this morning the day’s task just seemed so daunting. I really had to work hard mentally to get my butt out there especially after waking up to a gloomy day with a promise of rain. I think if I didn’t know that Jon and Alisha were coming down and staying overnight, I would have found some way to procrastinate until tomorrow. As it is I’m glad I had that motivator. I had to work hard to do my 5 hours and 50 minutes but in the end I felt pretty good. The 5 hours was 150 kms of bike ride, the last 40 kms in the rain, and the 50 minutes was 10 kms of running. All’s well that ends well.

Some years ago when we lived on Queen street in St Thomas, you would frequently see a unique couple walking the streets of our neighborhood. He was an older, quite tall gentleman and his friend was a not so old, and not so tall lady. A real caricature couple. From their mannerisms and the bits of conversation you could sometime overhear they were both clearly “special” in some way. This was not an unusual sight in our area of town, because there were several “community living” homes nearby. For several years I would see the two of them walking the streets, constantly in conversation, and despite their “uniqueness” they were quite obviously soul mates. Then one day I seen him by himself, and then again on another occasion…the gentleman all alone? For some time I never seen him at all until one day I was at the library and I seen him walk in…again alone. I admit that out of the corner of my eye I spied on him a little bit as he sat down at one of the reading tables. He spread out a bunch of books in front of him but instead of opening one of the books he had gathered, he reached into his pocket and pulled out a piece of paper. He unfolded what appeared to be a letter and from the state of the paper and the depth of the folds it was clear that this note had been carried around for some time and folded and unfolded a multitude of times. As if to confirm that, and while I watched, he put the letter away and pulled it out at least 2 more times. Every re- reading of it brought an intensity to his face that clearly indicated how priceless and significant the words on the page were. For some reason I had a certainty that the letter was from her. Whether circumstances took her out of his life in a temporary or a permanent way, I would never know, and if the truth be known perhaps the letter wasn’t even from her. Regardless of any of this, it was clear that words on a piece of paper meant so much to him that he was trying to preserve them for as long as possible, and that they had become an important part of his life.

So I know that you thought perhaps I was not going to come back to my letter at all but in fact I was just waiting for the feeling to be right and so here goes. First off I will not discourage you from trying to figure out who the letter was from, but I will not divulge the author unless I get permission to do so. I have shared it with my wife as I try to do all things unless specifically asked not to.

As to the letter itself I can tell you that I have already read it several times, and while perhaps I won’t get as obsessive as my old friend from the library I expect to read it many more times, and in fact intend on taking it with me to Penticton.

Why did these 2 pages of words…just words after all... strike such a chord with me? I guess I have to tell you a little about the contents to illustrate. After an introduction the writer starts with a reference to my journey from sickness to health, and then ultimately to fitness and beyond. He/she expresses appreciation for my willingness to share my journey through my writings, and commends my courage in doing so. As much as I take some pride in this, I know that it is only circumstance that brought me to that willingness. It may seem strange to you but despite all my bellyaching about my health, both physical and emotional, I truly do consider some aspects of my illness to have been a gift. One of these is the relative, reckless abandon with which I now make myself vulnerable to the world through my openness. I say relative because although I am now very candid compared to the way I was before I still want to do more. I have come to believe that only when I am prepared to be completely honest with the outside world will I be completely honest with myself, and in turn approach the inner harmony that I so strive for. For this reason I am grateful for the writers’ encouragement. If it somehow affects people in a positive way, why not keep doing it eh?

The writer then goes on to talk about ideas/thoughts/feelings triggered in his/her own mind when I shared some of my personal experiences. Especially those related to my youth at school and at home. I suppose we all have many stories that we’ve never told and maybe even many memories that we’ve suppressed. I acknowledge the writers commentary here as a rewarding side effect of a blog which was originally intended to make me think…not anyone out there!

He/She then goes on to thank me for my references to and interaction with my grandchildren and you can imagine what that means to me.

The next paragraph references my work and hit home with me again, and I quote, “I don’t think you ever do any real work. You just make time to sit and talk to people about their personal lives” Absolutely correct ! And coincidentally the aspect of my work that I’m most proud of.

We then come to the last paragraph which the writer claims to be the real reason for the letter in the first place. In their closing comments I am delivered an eloquent expression of their desires for me on race day and promises to send me energy throughout the day. The last 3 sentences near brought me to tears and indeed is the reason that the letter will go with me to Penticton. I give them to you also as the closing words of my post today. You will understand why I was so moved

“And when you toss aside your wetsuit, and park your bike, and it is nothing but you and the road, may the joy of living and breathing take you to the finish line with enough energy left to throw your arms in the air and then wrap them around your wife. And know that there are so many more of us who have followed you all day from wherever we are and celebrating with you. This is the wish that I send to you today”

I wish to dedicate day 325 to the old gentleman of the well read letter, whoever and whereever he is.

"You cannot dream yourself into a character: you must hammer and forge yourself into one."---Henry D. Thoreau

"Try not to become a man of success but a man of value."---Albert Einstein

love
peter